Amy Chua isn't really a Tiger Mom. She's a Hidden Dragon, to go by all that we can figure out from the plentiful blog posts bashing her approach to parenting her kids- Being loving while yelling 'You're Garbage' at them for not practicing their music for 4 hours without squirming, not allowing sleepovers, no Drama of any kind (other than what Mommy likes to indulge in.).
"There are times when it is hard to live with you. It is not unusual for you to have an excessively high opinion of yourself. This can grate on the rest of us in those moments when it is obvious to us you are superficial and your behavior tactless. And, occasionally, you can be insensitive and offensive in your speech and mannerisms. This is normally not intended but probably a consequence of your being wrapped up in your own thoughts rather than paying attention to our needs. In spite of these tendencies, you are likely to also have a warm, giving personality overall. You can be very generous to your loved ones. Also, that wonderful Dragon dynamism and infectious optimism is likely to keep you in good stead even when your behavior is not the best."
In contrast, according to the Chinese symbology, a Tiger shows the following traits:
"Your kinder and gentler side also includes a genuine humanitarian streak. You are empathetic and keenly sense the emotions and feelings of others, to which you respond with compassion and a sincere desire to help when needed. You tend to be very affectionate towards family and friends and charitable to everyone, being especially touched by those most in need."
Or, one could go to the other extreme of permissive parenting, and deify the Mama Grizzly of the Palinesque variety as the ultimate role model in Motherhood. Let your kids run wild and loose, and hope that they can all become reality show stars who make money out of their penchant to make spectacles of themselves on live TV or the tabloids.
Or, one could simply be a Bad Mother, a la Ayelet Waldman, who takes umbrage at Amy's over-coddled kids and advocates another version of laissez-faire which teeters between overindulgence and overcontrol (she is admittedly bipolar).
"Quit the piano and the violin, especially if their defeatist attitude coincided with a recital, thus saving me from the torture of listening to other people's precious children soldier through hackneyed pieces of the juvenile repertoire, plink after ever more unbearable plonk.
Sleep over at their friends' houses, especially on New Year's Eve or our anniversary, thus saving us the cost of a babysitter."
"I pointed at the remaining two grades, neither a solid A. Though there was not the "screaming, hair-tearing explosion" that Ms. Chua informs us would have greeted the daughter of a Chinese mother, I expressed my disappointment quite clearly. And though the word "garbage" was not uttered, either in the Hokkien dialect or in Yiddish, it was only because I feared my husband's opprobrium that I refrained from telling my daughter, when she collapsed in tears, that she was acting like an idiot."
Whatever be your style of parenting, you are glorified by the very term 'Mommy', and have full license to indulge in the parenting style of your choice, informed by your own life experiences.
Ave Mater Victoriosa, indeed!